9 Ways I Plan to Get My Life Together

Social media will have you convinced that some people really have the “perfect” life and have it all together. Let’s be honest, social media is just the highlight reel of our lives.  I’m the first to admit, I don’t have it all together.  I currently feel like I’m drowning.  I can’t seem to get a handle on my laundry, cleaning, my blog or my kids.  I know these are third world problems, but it’s not fun.  Just in case you already had the thought, no, I’m not depressed.  I’m truly happy.  I’m just have a constant feeling of what am I missing or supposed to be doing.  It’s keeping me up all night (along with a 12 month old).  Instead of continuing on in this state of chaos, I’ve decided to take control of my situation.  After having several conversations with other moms on and off the internets, I’m not the only one that feels this way.  I’m hoping that sharing how I plan to get my life together will help other women feeling the same way I do. small-27

Photo by Anna Lynn Hughes Photography

  1.  Plan.  I fell off dramatically with my planning.  I stocked up on all the pretty tapes and stickers to make planning fun.  That didn’t last long.  I’m a visual person and like to “see” my week so I want to get back to writing everything in my planner sans the stickers and tape.  Every Sunday I’m going to plan out the week ahead.
  2.  Make a schedule.  Peyton started a gymnastics team this summer and it is running our lives.  Poor Harper has to come along for a ride.  In addition to my planning, I’m going to make a daily schedule.  It will include meals, nap time, workouts and Peyton’s gymnastics.  I think this will help me to organize my days more instead of just winging it.
  3. Meal plan.  I’ve managed to do pretty good by keeping up with meal planning.  The weeks that I don’t meal plan just adds to the chaos.  I’ll continue to keep up with the planning, even planning when we’ll eat out during the week.
  4. Workout.  In my never ending battle to fit in my pre-pregnancy clothes, I need to get back to working out.  It’s so hard to get out of the house with a baby to hit the gym.  I know what you’re thinking, just workout at home.  I don’t enjoy working out at home as much as I do the gym.  Plus, trying to keep an eye on a one year old and workout at the same time can be stressful.  I’m going to make working out part of my daily schedule.
  5. Outsourcing.  I learned this from Johnson & Johnson Chief Diversity officer and mom, Wanda Bryant Hope at the Path to Power event that we both were co-panelist.  Things that I can’t handle and or don’t enjoy doing, I can outsource.  I’ve decided instead of getting overwhelmed with house cleaning, I’ll get someone else to do it.  I know you’re thinking that sounds expensive, but there are so many services that offer significant discounts on cleaning services.  I’ve paid as little as $60 to have my bathrooms, kitchen and floors cleaned.  As long as I have the coins, I will be doing this on a regular basis.
  6.  Mandatory mommy time.  Whether it’s getting my nails done, taking a trip to Walmart without kids, or brunch with my girls, I’m going to make sure I do it more often.  We need a break.  It’s ok for us to sit down and have a meal without constantly picking things off the floor, wiping ups spills and cutting up food.
  7. Childcare.  I feel like this blog has suffered because I’ve been trying to manage an active one year old while trying to produce new and fresh content.  I’ve failed.  After almost 6 years of blogging, I’m still full of ideas I want to share.  I can’t seem to find the time to implement them.  I want to do more outfit post, videos, and cool diy’s.  But when?  I’ve decided to get some help.  I’m currently building a team of babysitters that I trust to help me out so I can be more productive.  Nothing full-time, just a few hours a week so I can work without interruptions.  I’m making a comeback so please don’t write me off.
  8. Date nights.  I’m actually winning in this area.  Mister and I have managed to have more dates than ever this past year.  That’s a grand total of 5! Two of them were on the Disney Cruise.  LOL!  I know that’s not many but previous years it has been more like one and a possible date.  Now that we’ve been dating more, we’re hooked.  We look forward to that quality time together.  Having childcare has helped our dating life.  In the past, if family or friends couldn’t help us with our kids, we didn’t go.  We actually don’t like asking people to help out with our girls.  Now that we have a sitters on payroll, we don’t feel bad about going out more often.
  9. Meditation.  I have been the worst at sitting still and reflecting.  I’m going to set my alarm to remind me daily to stop, meditate and pray.  I already pray everyday but I want to be more intentional with my prayer and still time.  I know I really need this time to clear my mind and show gratitude.

That’s my plan.  Don’t let social media fool you.  Real life is not walking around with a photographers following your every move in the perfect light.  Real life is struggling to get kids ready for school after being up all night with a sick baby, planning meals, helping with homework and finding time to take a shower.  Motherhood isn’t easy.  There are times when we feel like we’re failing.  Just because our kitchens aren’t spotless doesn’t make it us a bad mom.  Sometimes we just need to hit the reset button.  It’s not a race to the “best mom” finish line.  You need to be the best mom YOU can be.  Emphasis on YOU, not the mom on Instragram with the pretty white photos.  We got this!

Can you relate?  How do you get your life together when you’re feeling overwhelmed?

 

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18 Comments

  • Reply Tiffany October 5, 2016 at 1:57 pm

    Yassssss. I am with you! I need to get some babysitters ASAP!!! LOL. Love everything about this! Outsourcing and planning in advance are my top two I’ve recently realized too.

  • Reply Maria D. October 5, 2016 at 2:24 pm

    This is all so true! Don’t forget to stay well hydrated during the day….it actually helps you relax to stop and drink a glass of water and helps your body and brain function better. Plus it’s okay to just say no to additional commitments- you have to take care of yourself and your family

  • Reply Alexia October 5, 2016 at 2:33 pm

    I needed all of this.. with a 2 month old & a 4 year old my life feels like it’s no longer my own.

  • Reply Karyn October 5, 2016 at 2:58 pm

    I love this post. I keep trying to resurrect my blog but my fresh/creative ideas are competing with Caleb, increased responsibilities at work, and trying to keep my house together. It’s a blessing to have these things in my life but I’m a hot mess on most days. Thanks for keeping it real and sharing these tips.

  • Reply Natasha H October 5, 2016 at 6:52 pm

    Preach Trina!

  • Reply CaNesha October 5, 2016 at 11:04 pm

    OMG…it’s just me and I’m overwhelmed. I’ve been blogging on and off for over a year but can’t be consistent. Somedays I work over 10 hours and when I come home I want to crash. Trying to workout at least 3 times a week and sometimes I’m to tired. And let’s not even talk about keeping my house clean. The most I can say I do is laundry. Ughh. Thanks for sharing will definitely try some of these tips.

  • Reply BabyBrownSugr October 6, 2016 at 2:15 am

    I CAN RELATE. As a fellow mommy, I know and understand the struggle. What is helping me most is giving myself a break. When those negative thoughts pop up in your head to make you feel like you’re not “enough” or you’re missing out on life, you have to smash them immediately. You are doing your BEST. And everyone, perfect IG pics or not, is struggling to find their happy. Social media is just a highlight reel, mostly of the glamorous moments. I’ve learned to be patient with myself and not feel less-than when I don’t get something on my to-do list done because I was catering to my baby. You are a wonderful mother Trina and you are doing your best. It never hurts to set goals to be better, but in the process be patient with yourself and know that your family appreciates your sacrifice even if you don’t get a “thank you” everyday.

  • Reply Toia B. October 6, 2016 at 9:57 am

    Awesome sentiments… some of which I needed to read myself! 😉

  • Reply christina mitchell October 6, 2016 at 10:00 am

    Its so funny how people you dont know personally can motivate you! I am going to piggy back off of some of your ideas and get my life. Keep us posted so I can stay accountable with myself. Otherwise I will fall off the wagon.

  • Reply Toia B. October 6, 2016 at 10:09 am

    Trina, you’re so in my head! I’ve been recently mulling over a similar list of things I need to start doing (better) so I don’t feel so unmotivated & overwhelmed but, instead, feel more accomplished by the end of the day. It’s tough.

    You’re doing WAY better than I am in the blog area. I’d have never guessed that you were struggling to stay afloat but you obviously have specific content goals so I hear you. I tweeted the other day that I’ve got 22 blog drafts just sitting there. *sigh* The ideas are there but between dealing with a toddler and just being too tired afterwards to keep my eyes open to type, the blog suffers. But a few people have said to me that the blog will still be there. You’re doing your best, as Christina said. You’re a mommy first and you’re doing an amazing job! 🙂
    Xoxo

  • Reply Nikesha October 6, 2016 at 10:40 am

    Trina,
    I can totally relate to how you are feeling. You are so right in that PLANNING is key. I had this conversation with my sister-in law, who also has a lot on her plate. We came up with some ways to make our lives more bearable, but I definitely use some of your tips as well. Thanks girly!

  • Reply Latoya October 6, 2016 at 12:10 pm

    Yes yes yesssssssssssss to all of it!!!! Keep pushing forward (I’m talking to the both of us)

  • Reply Lauren October 6, 2016 at 10:41 pm

    Listen as you know you just hit the nail on the head on ALL of this!! I’m in the process of getting my life together & ma’am seem to be in the same boat! Thank you for your transparency.

  • Reply Carla October 8, 2016 at 3:38 pm

    Such a great post!! I can relate so much! Thank you for posting the tips.

  • Reply Marchelle October 8, 2016 at 5:06 pm

    The reason I love your blog is because I see so many similarities it’s kind of hilarious (two baby girls, hubby and juggling life). I am definitely feeling the pressure of getting it all done and getting it done well. Before kids I was the party planner, dinner out organizer, shopping buddy and date night extraordinaire! Now I can barely make it out of the house with my 10 month old and three year old little ladies in the morning. And I had a blog that fell off quickly after my first was born (would love to revamp it). Thanks for sharing in such an open community and being honest. It is greatly appreciated.

  • Reply Chardae October 10, 2016 at 5:54 pm

    Thanks so much for posting this. Social media can make life seem perfect and make you feel like a failure but this Mom thing is tough! I gonna take some advice from you and get my life right too!

  • Reply Shakira October 18, 2016 at 11:41 am

    Oh my goodness this post came right on time!!! Ive definitely been feeling overwhelmed with a full time job and full time mommy/fiance. I have some personal goals I want to complete, but the struggle is real!!!! I love your honesty on the mom/wife life and all it entails. I will definitely take this advice and get my life together@@@@

  • Reply Charlotte October 18, 2016 at 9:37 pm

    Thanks for sharing the reality of motherhood and/or just life in general! What a great read. You know I don’t always make time to read my Bible, but one thing I do is pray and release my day in God’s Hands the minute I open my eye, I ask Him to lead my day and things usually work out. Love your plan!

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